Interview with an Author

As anyone who reads this blog, or follows me on social media knows, tomorrow is release day for The Most Important Women of the Bible, the book I wrote with my amazing wife, Elaina. 

Now that we are less than a day away from the book becoming available I thought it would be funny to conduct a wide-ranging interview with my lovely coauthor, who happened to be dead-tired when we did this. Yes, in case someone asks, she knew I was posting this online. 

We actually conducted this interview via text message while we were sitting right beside each other in the same room. It made for a pretty funny way to conduct the interview, which is what I was going for. I thought about just posting the text bubbles, but decided to go with this format instead. The only difference is that there are a couple of emojis that didn't make the cut. All explanatory notes added after the interview are italicized.

Without further adieu, here is my interview with my wife, best friend, mother of my children, and coauthor:

Aaron: So how does it feel to add "published author" to your resume?

Elaina: I'm not sure. I've been too busy trying to get the Demolitions Expert to keep her diaper on.

This is a true story. The child is Houdini.

Aaron: Because it is all about me, do you feel this book will negatively impact my writing career now that people know you are the brains of the operation?

Elaina: It's definitely all about you. ("Aaron, Aaron, Aaron" said in the whiny Jan Brady voice.) I think people will just think you're smarter for having found me. We are a brilliant team after all.

Aaron: We are a good team. What was your favorite part of working on a book together?

Elaina: Finishing it.

The funny thing about being an author is that by the time you get to your final deadline you are incredibly relieved just to be done with the thing.

Aaron: What are some similarities between writing a book and raising children?

Elaina: You love them, but you can get really tired of them. The process of creating both of them is different than you might think.

Both are exhausting. Both can give you a migraine. And both can make you question why you ever thought this was a good idea.

Aaron: What are the odds I talk you into doing this again?

Elaina: What are you going to bribe me with?

Aaron: Depends on how many books we sell.

Aaron: We had three kids when we started this book, and by release day we had four. Are these events related.

Elaina: Sorry. I lost my train of thought. What was the question?

Aaron: The kids seem more interested in reading Magic Treehouse books than our book, are you offended by this?

Elaina: A little. I do a lot for them. The least they could do for me is read my book.

If we write a book about The Most Important Animals of the Bible the Zoologist would be first in line to order it.

Aaron: Jochebed, the mother of Moses, appears in our book. She sent her son down the river in a small boat to save his life. How many times a week does this seem like a good idea with one of our kids?

Elaina: Well, we had to clean up at least 5 potty accidents/bodily function mishaps last week. So, a small, floating wicker basket seems like a good idea at least 8 out of 7 days.

If you don't appreciate this you aren't a parent.

Aaron: Final question, and I'll let you get some rest. Where is the Demolitions Expert? I just see a diaper.

Elaina: Probably scaring the neighbors again. It was your turn to watch her.